if it smells like funk it must be me

I'm in a little bit of a blogging funk lately. Truth be told I get a little bummed about blogging from time to time… I don't have a lot of followers or commenters. I mean, I can even count the number of my own family members who read it regularly on one hand (maybe even three fingers).. so sometimes I feel like maybe no one even really cares. Why should I blog? I don't have one of those perfectly written or stunning photo kind of sites.. the ones where every shot and sentence is perfection. I don't have a ton of inspiration to share, or beautiful things to talk about. That's just not me. But then I was thinking, that doesn't really matter. I didn't start doing this with any of those intentions so why do I expect myself to do those things now? Whose standard am I not holding up to? My own? --well, that's just stupid. haha. 

I blog because I enjoy it. I'm not really trying to inspire anyone, though if someone finds inspiration here for any aspect of their lives I'd consider it a bonus. I like to share little pieces of my life. I like a place to post my latest projects and talk about them. I have fun raving like a fangirl over new scrappy projects and posting holy crap moments about roller derby. I even get a big kick out of posting silly dance videos, with no shame whatsoever I might add. (In fact I've considered changing my blog name to Scrappy Dance and making the videos a regular thing.) 

So the blog funk has been a good thing, maybe. I'm reassessing why it is I'm doing this… what kinds of things do I want to share? Is it ok to share all of my silly little thoughts and stories along with all of the heavy stuff I've been handling over the past year side by side? Can this really be a place where I can just let it all hang out? --- I mean, in theory, if no one is reading or commenting anyway it shouldn't really matter what the heck I post, right? Bueller? Bueller? 

Ok. SO. Here's the thing. I've always tried to keep it real here... but the thing is if I'm in a real funk or something really crazy happens, or I'm in the mood to vent I don't do it here. Like I don't share the stories about the one time when I *almost* pooped my pants in a Target because I thought the bathroom was in the back of the store but it was actually in the front (keeping it classy in Cleveland, y'all)----- I mean, I don't post because I don't want you to judge… but the reality is, that s- happened. I mean, it really didn't actually happen.. like I didn't actually go, but I was so close I swear I had one of those Bridesmaids (the movie) moments where I felt like she did when she went running for the bathroom and just sorta crumpled into the middle of the street and well, *spoiler alert*, went… except I was able to save mine… but it was a close one. I mean, how could I not share that story? It's funny! And we've all been there, right? Am I RIGHT?! hello? anyone?

Anyyyyway. Now I'm embarrassed… and rethinking this whole post, actually… because here I am whining and complaining, "whaaa, how come nobody cares about my scrappy little bloooooooog!?"-- and then I'm like trying to tell you that it will be better and different and I go into a story about poop… and I bet you are all convinced that I am totally not being honest, and that I did in fact have to buy myself so new undies that day.. and I swear I didn't. Maybe I should rethink my tactics.

But, what the hell. That's me. I'm going to let it all hang out from now on. (and now are you just picturing a lot of bathroom issues with every sentence?-- shoot. not my intention, but I can't blame you… I mean everything is just coming out wrong… oh, I did it again.) Bottom line (she said bottom, this girls hilarious--- thats what you're thinking, right?) I'm going to post photos of my epic-ly dirty house… and photos with my kids in their underpants (why won't my 4 year old keep her clothes on?!).. and cry into the computer when something doesn't go my way…. and yes, there might even be more poop stories, cuz they really shouldn't put Starbucks into Targets, ok? Just saying. ---so if you're into that kind of thing then you're in luck. and if not… well, were you ever really here anyway? Either way I'm guessing it'll still be Cricket City so I might as well have fun blogging for myself! :)