FREAK OOOOOUT!

I might be losing my mind.

This baby will be here in less than 6 weeks and I am NOT READY. At least I don't feel ready. Every time I whine to Hottie about just how ill prepared we are he just chuckles and says, "it'll be ok babe." Then it dawned on me that there are a couple of very good reasons why he is not worried whatsoever. 1-he doesn't have to deliver what might end up being a 10 lb baby. (remember I said I have big ones, I wasn't lyin'. Ev was 9lb. 11oz.) 2-I am planning on breast feeding so there is not a whole lot for him to worry about in the up all night department. 3-he is a dude. Not bashing Dad's or anything but they just aren't prone to sweating the small stuff. Especially my guy. He could really care less that the crib isn't assembled, or that we don't have a car seat yet, or that this is all going to cost a small fortune. He knows we are good parents and do just fine with infants, so he feels that's all the preparation we need.

Not me.
I am fuh-reak-ing out.

First of all, I saw the doc yesterday and she is already on board with inducing me up to a week early. Since I have big babes and super short labors she feels it's a really good idea to go as early as the 27th. (ah!) I'd feel so much better, and even be looking forward to getting it over with, if we were more prepared. Right now I just feel like there is a ticking clock and I am pretty sure I'm not going to pull this off. at all.

I've been making list after list after list of what we need to get done. (I literally made 9 lists total. I told you I am crazy.) Too bad I run out of energy so easily. THis is exactly why they tell you you should get the nursery ready during your 2nd trimester. The other day I attempted to do an epic amount of deep cleaning and ended up tweaking my back. That put me out of commission for two whole days. Dang it. I cried when I saw that Evareaux smeared her little paw prints all over the bathroom mirror. (Not holding it together.) Back to square one.

So some of the things that are weighing heavily on my mind are....
*Finishing His Room: Putting together and cleaning the crib (I thought about painting it but time will not allow), Putting together and painting the dresser, Hanging the shelves, Building the bookshelf, Mounting the wall hangings, Making more robots, Corner mobile, etc etc etc.
*Buying Stuff: Carseat and Bunting, Clothes, Hats, Blankets, Swaddlers, Swing, Rocking Chair, Bouncy Seat,  Co-Sleeper, Towels, Lotion and Soap, Bottles, Breast Pump Acc, Hooter Hider, Sling, Boppy, stuff I need for the hospital and nursing, the list goes on and on. We barely have anything. The only real step I've taken towards this is completing a registry with Babies R Us... just so that I have a list of what we need to buy. I've also purchased some clothes over the past couple of months so he is ok in that department.
*Randoms: Washing all baby's bedding and clothing, Cleaning the house top to bottom, Painting the bathroom, Painting our room, Finish up the living room decor, Clear out the dining room (which has become a junk catch all), etc. etc. etc.

Now, I know that when it comes down to it the randoms are really not that important. The baby won't care if our bedroom isn't painted or if the house isn't spotless and organized. But I will. It's just that many fewer things I will be thinking about. When he arrives I want to be able to focus solely on him and my other kiddos and soak up those first couple of precious months. I know how fleeting that time is... and I know myself. I will be distracted by finishing up all of the additional projects if we don't do them before hand.

Pardon my freak out. I know there are a lot of perfectly good solutions to make me feel ready...... like...... GETTING STUFF DONE!!!!!!! haha. I really am working on chipping away bit by bit. Also, Hottie says that I should just go to the store and get ALL of the stuff this nugget needs so that I can stop worrying about it. I tend to worry about money and the thought of spending all that at once makes me more than a little ill. But. He says we need it anyway so, DO IT.

Maybe by this time next week I will have a finished nursery and all of his stuff that I can share with you. Hey, a girl can dream.